"We read to know that we are not alone."

"Books are the quietest and most constant of friends; they are the most accessible and wisest of counselors, and the most patient of teachers." - Charles William Eliot

When I read this blog post, I could totally relate.   My books are some of my favorite things, but there are times when I stare at my bookshelves and almost feel a little guilty that I have so many unread treasures just sitting there, especially when I continue to check books out from the library.  I just finished a book this morning that has been on my shelves for years, and I even started that book before reading Sankovitch's post.

One True Thing was the book I finished this morning.  I was inspired to read it because I just listened to another of Quindlen's books (see below), and I felt this past week was a good time to read this particular book that I have been avoiding for quite awhile.

Did you see the movie One True Thing?  It's with Renee and Meryl and is about a daughter who takes care of her mother who is dying from cancer.  The movie nearly killed me, so I have resisted reading the book, for obvious reasons.  However, this coming up week is the anniversary of my mom's death, so I have been thinking more about that than usual.  Not thinking more about my mom, mind you, because I think of her every day, but thinking more about the months leading up to her death and then the anniversary which is on September 25th.  I have this weird penchant for reading moms-dying-of-cancer books.  Randy frequently asks me why I do that to myself, and I have not been able to come up with an answer.  Recently, I was talking to a friend about One True Thing, and I realized that maybe the reason I like cancer books is that after your loved one dies, no one really wants to talk about it anymore.  It's not like I want to sit around talking about watching someone die from cancer, but it was probably one of the most profound and impacting experiences I have had, so it is not like it leaves me.  Maybe reading these books is a way for me to relate, connect, grieve, think, remember, cry, etc. that I don't get in my every day life.

I just finished listening to Quindlen's newest book, Lots of Candles, Plenty of Cake, and I really enjoyed it.  It is about aging, and while I'm not venturing into my sixties like Quindlen, I am closing in on 40, so some of the things she discusses have been on my mind, to a lesser degree.  I liked the things she had to say about marriage and family, but I really connected with what she had to say about friendship.

Quindlen writes, "Ask any woman how she makes it through the day, and she may mention her calendar, her to-do lists, her babysitter.  She may say that she's learned to let unnecessary tasks ride, that she no longer worries too much about home-cooked meals or clean countertops, ... that she gets her reading done by listening to audiobooks in the car and sends email messages from her phone while she's having her hair cut.  But if you push her on how she really makes it through her day, or, more important, her months and years, how she stays steady when things get rocky, ... she won't mention any of those things.  She will mention her girlfriends.  The older we get, the more we understand that the women who know and love us - and love us despite what they know about us - are the joists that hold up the house of our existence.  Everything depends on them."

Does it get any more true than that?

After finishing Quindlen's book, I was super excited to listen to Carry On Warrior by Glennon Doyle Melton.  Some of you may know her from Momastery.  She is hilarious, she is real, and she is inspiring.  I have been following her blog for a while, but I couldn't wait to listen to her book.  I was even more excited to learn that she read it herself.  She's a Christian, so some of her essays that had to do with God and Jesus didn't really resonate with me, but within those chapters she also talked about bravery and kindness.  Those are things that spread across faith and belief system and should strike a chord with whoever is listening.  I have been reading, seeing, hearing things about kindness a lot lately. I don't know if it is being talked about more, or if I'm just noticing better (sort of like now that I'm dreaming of driving a Honda Pilot, I see them EVERYWHERE.).  My personal goal right now is to be kind, think kind, act kind.  It's so important.

Somehow the next book I had to get to listen to is Lean In by Sheryl Sandberg.  I'm not super thrilled about the transition from the two inspiring books I experienced to this one, but maybe it will be inspiring in a different way.  I'm not very far into it, but I am looking forward to "reading" what all the buzz was about.

Before the cancer book, I read the second to last Maisie Dobbs book.  I only have one left before I am caught up, and I am sort of dreading it.  I feel like I kind of know Maisie Dobbs right now, and I am going to be super sad when there aren't any future books to read.  For those of you who enjoy historical fiction and also like mysteries, I can't say enough good things about Maisie Dobbs.

Trey and I continue to read volumes every night.  Right now his favorites are Clifford books (hate them), Max and Ruby (they're okay), and fairy tales.  I have been reading him Max and Ruby and Mickey Mouse versions of fairy tales, so I was sort of shocked when I read him the "real" tales from Lucy Cousins' volume called Yummy.

Apparently, it's been years since I've read the "real" Little Red Riding Hood because I was not expecting what happened in this book.

Trey now calls this book the "bad guys book" and wants to read it every night.  Of course he does.

I'm at the reading moment that I love.  Finished One True Thing this morning and about to delve into a new book.  One thing I love/appreciate about Facebook is liking or following authors I enjoy.   Right now that includes Kelly Corrigan, Anne Lamott, Elizabeth Gilbert, Will Schwalbe (another cancer book), Joshua Henkin, and Cheryl Strayed to name a few.  I really like it when they make book recommendations.  Anne Lamott recommended Me Before You by JoJo Moyes which I am starting tonight.  Can't wait!

I got to read a lot during the summer which I loved, but I am looking forward to fall and winter.  There's something so cozy about reading when it's raining outside or next to the fire.  What's on your stack, reader? 

Saying goodbye to summer

Overall, I rate this summer as a 9.  We had some great weekend vacations (beach, Anacortes), super fun playdates (mostly with Camille who, by the way, gets her own two page spread in the Summer 2013 book I just made from Shutterfly), and some really fun days to myself when Trey was in daycare.  I had so much fun spending quality time with Trey this summer, and I loved watching him grow and learn.  I wasn't as worried about naps this summer as I have been in the past, and while the food/eating thing was stressful, I am glad that the tonsils/adenoids surgery seems to have fixed the problem.

On Labor Day weekend, Randy, Trey, Bailey, and I went to my dad and Sandy's house for the long weekend.   We hadn't been there since June, so it was high time we made the trip.  I also wanted to see Sarah Long and get my hair cut one last time by my hairdresser before she sadly moves to Virginia.  The weekend was filled with all of our favorite things: the trampoline, playing with "Grandpa Erts," breakfast with Sarah, and banana pancakes made by "Sanny".  The highlight, however, was our day trip on Sunday to Triangle Lake.  This is where Sandy and her kids spend many weekends over the summer, and we had never taken Trey out there.  We didn't camp because I wasn't prepared to pack for a camping trip, but that worked out okay because the day trip was awesome.

Trey is all charged up to jump on the trampoline. 

I'd like to talk for a few minutes about our dog.  For those of you who know me, I am not really an animal person.  I don't really dislike animals, but I could handle never having one in my house again.  Ever.  However, for those of you who know Randy, you know that isn't really an option.  We lost Tango last June 2012, and, while I loved Tango, I felt lucky that I got a six month reprieve before Randy started searching for a new dog.  Enter Bailey.

Here are some pictures that give you an idea of his personal space issues:

(I always feel like I have to make a bottle disclaimer.  This photo was from March.  And as an aside, Trey still has a bottle, but only asks for it a few times a week, usually just to hold when he's upset.  My goal is that he just stops wanting it rather than us having to throw it away and make it traumatic.  So far, it's working out great.)

Here is Bailey with Julie's father in law.  This is how Bailey is...pretty much all of the time.

Basically, Bailey and I are having some relationship problems.  I don't like him very much and he wants to fix that, pronto.  He is frequently in my space, wanting attention, and licking me constantly.  He drives me effing crazy.  When we were at my dad's over Labor Day, Randy left to go fishing early (like 4am early).   I had already slept shitty that night because a) I always sleep shitty at my dad's house and b) Bailey had Randy up all night so the door across the hall kept creaking open and closed all night long (side note: we split up the kid and the dog when we stay there so we are in different bedrooms).  Randy brought Bailey to me at 4am and left for his fishing trip (we don't trust the dog to be unsupervised in the house).  Bailey proceeded to whine for the next 30 minutes and even mark the rug that was in the room.  I could have killed him.  I really did not want him to wake Trey up, and I also wanted to get some more sleep myself, so I put Bailey out in the car at 4:30am.  He's a dog.  He can handle it.

When I brought Bailey back in at 6:15am, after walking him a little bit, he proceeded to poop in the house.  Let me just say that Bailey, while being one of the most annoying dogs ever, does not poop in the house unless he is trapped.  I quickly took him outside and walked him around to try to get him to finish the job.  No go.  I brought him back to the deck, put the handle of his leash under a leg of a bench, and went inside to clean up.  When I came out to walk him some more, he got all hyper and was jumping around.  He brought his skull right up my eye socket and gave me a good whack resulting in a nice bruise on my eye.  I was pissed.  Still, he wouldn't poop anymore.  I brought him back inside, sat back in the recliner, and he proceeded to squat and try to poop RIGHT IN FRONT OF ME.  I yanked him to the front door, mid poop, and took him outside again.  Still no poop.  This dog is really making me angry.  I bring him back inside and go get dressed for my haircut.  I decide to walk him one more time before I leave for my haircut, and as I walk him across the lawn, his collar somehow comes off the leash and he runs away.  #$%&*^#@$!!!!!!  A downside of Bailey, of which there are many, is that he won't come when called.  While my dad and Sandy live on a nice sized property, Bailey, of course, made a dash for the road.  The highway isn't that far away.  I went back, got some meatballs in a dish to try and lure him to me, and got my keys.  I drove up and down the road, becoming later and later for my haircut which was 30 minutes away, yelling out his name.  As I turned around on the road to go back to my dad's, I saw him standing in front of my dad's driveway.  I drove back, opened up the hatch, and he came running for me.   I got him in the car, took him back to my dad's (no meatballs necessary, thank goodness, because the little effer didn't deserve them), and tied him up to a tree with a wire lead/cord that Randy brought with us.   I put water out (because I'm not cruel), got in my car, and raced off to my haircut.

When I came back two hours later from my haircut, this is what I found:

OH MY GOD!!!!!!!!! 

This is an OMG of anger and frustration, not fear and panic that the dog is gone.

Needless to say, he had spent most of my haircut in the house with my family, but of course when I got there he ran off again.  I decided I didn't care and that he would come back eventually.  Which, unfortunately, he did.  

Later, I decided if he was going to run off and come back, I might as well enjoy it.  Trey, Bailey, Max (my dad and Sandy's dog) and I went out to play in the yard.  Bailey got himself into the river for a little swim.  That was kind of cute.  

Then he proceeded to run off again and after about 10 minutes, I wondered if I should worry.  Trey and I went around the yard yelling, "Baaaaayyyyy-Leeeeeeeeeeee!!!" over and over.  Eventually, he came back.  Bummer.

Here's my token picture of sitting by the river and reading, something I manage to do most times we go to my dad and Sandy's.  One of my favorite places, for sure.

On Sunday, Randy, my dad, Trey and I went up to Triangle Lake to meet Sandy, Erika, and John.  For those of you who are new blog readers or don't remember the story, Sandy is my dad's wife, but she is also my aunt.  She was married to my mom's brother, Jerry, who died from cancer in the early 2000's.   After my mom died in 2005, my dad and Sandy found love with each other.   So.....Erika and John are my cousins AND my stepsister and brother.  Neither label sounds right to me, so I just don't really call them anything except Aunt Erika and Uncle John to Trey.  Anyway...

Again, for those of you who know me, you know that camping is not really my thing.  People ask why and I usually (quickly, mind you) list off: bugs, sleeping on ground, and dirt.  However, I could get used to camping like this:

Range, BBQ, another BBQ, another BBQ, kitchen shed including counter, 

refrigerator, and portapotty. 

Coffee maker and microwave in the kitchen shed

View from the "kitchen" down to the lake 

Inside Sandy's tent 

This is a big blow up mattress.  

Not the kind of dinky blow up mattress we have, but a really comfortable one.  

With sheets, pillows, and a comforter.  

Hey, Randy, are you listening?  I could camp like this.

The ladies on the dock next to the party boat which we were lucky to ride on 

Trey and Randy playing in the shade 

In the afternoon, we all went out on the party boat.  It was so nice to be on the water in the sun with our drinks in hand.  The only thing missing was a toilet...

Connor, John's son, even taught Trey how to drive the boat 

He's a natural

I think this was the first time that Trey and Randy have fished side by side.  Super cute.

Trey loved being in the water.  He started with his clothes on...

Then he moved to just his diaper...

Then just went in the buff.  Here he had to get out because Randy was trying to catch a fish he spotted.  Certainly don't want any stray hooks floating around a nakie boy.

Of course, before we left we had to make s'mores. Trey is in love with marshmallows right now after going camping with Randy, and he especially likes s'mores.

I can't think of a better way to end the summer: sunshine, water, boats, and family.  It doesn't get much better than that.

Boys Only Camping Weekend....wait, what?

If you're looking for an eloquently written blog post, you may as well click the back arrow on your browser.  So, here it goes...

Since last summer my good friend, Jason (the owner of a 3-something year old, Declan) and I had been tossing around the idea of doing a boys camping trip (and yes, I'm eternally thankful this did not take place last summer when the boys were two when we first conceived the idea).  We finally set a weekend aside in late August.  We somehow managed to score a decent spot in the middle of a summer weekend at Timothy Lake because of a cancellation and a little schmoozing by Ryan, another good friend who came out with his 3 year old Rayden, the night before.  So let's see, three dads with their three three year old boys on what was essentially their first camping trip.  This is a good idea, right?  What could possibly go wrong?  I'll let the pictures tell the story...

May as well get it started off right...with a nap.

Here's the spread...tents behind me (Ryan, Trey, Declan, Jason).  and yes, one kid short...

What camping trip doesn't start with a little jumping on the bed (Declan & Trey)?

Exploration time...

King of the rock...for now.

Prepping for a boat ride

No camping trip would be complete without s'mores

What happens when 3 dads get their 3 year olds down to bed after a full day of exploring?  um, head to bed before 10:00, of course!

Day two started out, naturally with a little more exploring (Trey & Rayden)

once again prepping the boat in hopes of a boat ride...

Fish were caught....(Trey, Declan & and some poor sap of a hatchery fish)

Sometimes it's hard to say goodbye

Parting shot...GO BRONCOS!

Yeah, I'd do it again...